25. What is the Relationship Between ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria?
Photo by Ricky Esquivel
John always felt like an outsider. He was easily distracted in school and had trouble paying attention. He was also very impulsive and often got into trouble. As he got older, his problems continued. He had difficulty holding down a job and often got fired. He also had trouble making friends and often felt isolated and alone.
John often became very upset and angry when he felt rejected or criticized. He would also have difficulty recovering from these experiences. He would often ruminate on the negative things that had happened to him and start believing he was worthless and unlovable.
John was in a meeting with his boss and two other coworkers. They were discussing a new project that John was supposed to be leading.
"I'm not sure I'm the right person for this," John said. "I'm not very good at planning and organizing."
"Don't worry," his boss said. "We'll help you out."
But John was still worried. He knew he could have been better at planning and organizing and was afraid he would let his team down.
The meeting ended, and John went back to his desk. He started to work on the project, but he quickly got overwhelmed. He couldn't figure out how to organize his thoughts and felt he would fail.
He got up and went for a walk. He needed to clear his head. As he walked, he thought about all the times he had failed. He remembered all the times he had been rejected and criticized.
He returned to his desk and tried to work on the project again but couldn't focus. Though his colleagues offered their help, it was too embarrassing to ask them. He was too upset, and he decided to go home.
During the drive home, he thought about giving up on the project. He thought about quitting his job, and he thought about running away and never coming back.
What is Rejection-Sensitive Dysphoria, and how do you know if you might have it?
Rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD) is a term used to describe the intense emotional pain felt in response to perceived (or actual) rejection or criticism. It is often associated with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
What is ADHD?
Those of you who listen regularly are tired of hearing this by now. Still, for those unaware, ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects attention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. People with ADHD may struggle to pay attention, stay on task, and control their impulses. They may also be hyperactive and have difficulty sitting still.
What is RSD?
RSD is a condition that often occurs in people with ADHD. It is characterized by an intense emotional reaction to perceived or actual rejection or criticism. People with RSD may feel deeply hurt, humiliated, or ashamed when rejected or criticized. They may also have difficulty recovering from these experiences.
What is the Relationship Between ADHD and RSD?
The exact relationship between ADHD and RSD is not fully understood. However, it is thought that they may be related to differences in brain structure and function. People with ADHD often have difficulty with emotional regulation, meaning they have trouble controlling their emotions. This can make them more sensitive to rejection and criticism.
In addition, people with ADHD may have a lower threshold for feeling rejected. This means they may perceive rejection even when it is not happening. For example, a person with ADHD may feel rejected if they are not invited to a party, even if it was not meant to be exclusive.
If you go back to Dr. Gabor Mate's explanation of how ADHD occurs in the brain, I'd say a more thorough understanding of RSD can be reached. It has something to do with how the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex develop in an individual and what type of environment in early childhood development occurs.
To guess a bit further, I wonder if it would be a stretch to think this person may have grown up in a household where they were constantly invalidated, didn't receive much attention, or were verbally abused.
How RSD Affects People with ADHD
Regardless, RSD can significantly impact the lives of people with ADHD. It can make it difficult to form relationships, succeed in school or work, and participate in social activities. People with RSD may also be more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and other mental health problems.
What are the symptoms of RSD?
The symptoms of RSD can vary from person to person but may include the following:
Feeling deeply hurt, humiliated, or ashamed when rejected or criticized
Having difficulty recovering from rejection or criticism
Avoiding situations where they might be rejected or criticized
Having low self-esteem
Feeling like a failure
Being overly sensitive to criticism
Being quick to anger
Having mood swings
Feeling hopeless
Having suicidal thoughts
If you are experiencing any of these symptoms, talking to a doctor or therapist is essential. RSD is a natural and serious condition, but it can be managed with the proper treatment.
How is RSD treated?
There is no one-size-fits-all treatment for RSD. However, several things can help, including:
Talk therapy. Therapy can help you to understand your RSD and develop coping mechanisms.
Medication. In some cases, medication may help manage the symptoms of RSD.
Support groups. Support groups provide a safe space to talk about your RSD with others who understand what you are going through.
Self-care. Taking care of yourself physically and emotionally can help you to manage your RSD. This includes getting enough sleep, eating healthy foods, and exercising regularly.
Coping with RSD
There is no cure for RSD, but there are several things that people can do to manage their symptoms. These include:
Seeking professional help. A therapist can help you to understand your RSD and develop coping mechanisms.
Learning to identify your triggers. Once you know what triggers your RSD, you can avoid those situations.
Practicing self-compassion. It is essential to be kind to yourself, even when you make mistakes.
Building a solid support network. Having people you can talk to about your RSD can help you feel less alone.
Learning to manage your emotions. Several techniques can help you manage your feelings, such as deep breathing and mindfulness.
Here are some additional tips for managing RSD:
Talk to your friends and family about your RSD. Let them know how you are feeling and ask for their support.
Set realistic expectations for yourself. Don't expect to be perfect all the time. Everyone makes mistakes.
Learn to say no. It's okay to say no to things you don't want to do.
Take care of yourself. Ensure you get enough sleep, eat healthy foods, and exercise regularly.
Seek professional help if you need it. A therapist can help you to develop coping mechanisms for managing your RSD
Remember, you are not alone. Many people understand what you are going through and can help you manage your symptoms.
Conclusion
RSD is a natural and serious condition that can significantly impact the lives of people with ADHD. If you are struggling with RSD, please know you are not alone, and many people understand what you are going through and can help you manage your symptoms.
Alright, until next week. Much love, D.C. out!